What draws us to the beauty of men? Do we engage it or run far from it? Join Tom, Ryan, and Matt for a discussion on masculine beauty! Learn why this topic has become something of Ryan’s “brand,” including a perspective shift that’s helped many members of our YOB community. We talk about navigating the tension between admiration and lust, gratitude and envy, and participation and insecurity in our interactions with the beautiful men around us. How do we direct our observations of masculine beauty back to the Creator?

Once upon a time, Your Other Brothers held to the value of brotherhood! But we've since shifted this value to one of kinship. Why the change? What does kinship evoke, both for this life and the next, and how do we build or "practice" this value of kinship? When have we felt that sense of belonging outside our blood family, and when have we felt the opposite with our sexuality and masculinity, as strangers and aliens?

Vulnerability is uncomfortable, even scary, so why do we value it so highly in our community? Sharing our story, including our sexuality, may have once felt like the most daunting or impossible task. And yet what would have been the cost to our lives had we not been vulnerable? What if we had stayed silent, closeted, cut off from such a significant aspect of ourselves with ourselves, God, and other people? Indeed, what if vulnerability that feels like weakness is actually strength – especially when practiced in a community?

Joy and sorrow share a tenuous connection. We explore the presence of joy in our YOB community and why it wasn’t one of our original values. We bask in the joy of retreats past and explore the joy to be found in our lives and sexualities, looking to Jesus’ example as he took the cup from his Father, following the joy set before him. Join Tom, Ryan, and Will for their first joyful episode together!

Many gay or SSA folks experience a delayed or second adolescence in adulthood after keeping our sexuality secret in our first adolescence when we unconsciously adapted to the heteronormative culture around us. When we finally do find safe masculine circles, whether within YOB or elsewhere, conversational topics like sex or masturbation, or shared male experiences like nudity and cuddling hold great appeal – if not laced with some of that adolescent immaturity or a tinge (or bucketload) of obsession.

And we're back! After a summer retreat that reunited our supporters after two and a half years away, we return with a brand new YOBcast – with more episodes on the way! This episode we're talking about mountaintops and valleys: those proverbial "everything is bold and clear" and "everything is long and dark" seasons of life. Coming off a YOBBERS retreat is a mountaintop experience for many in our community. How do we come back from experiences like that? And what are some other mountaintop moments we've experienced beyond YOB?

Dr. Paul Eddy of Bethel University joins us for our "season finale" of sorts to discuss covenant – particularly the covenant of friendship. Paul lays out the components of covenant, including terms and signs and witnesses, and translates this particular covenant to the grander scheme of God's eternal covenant with His people. Afterward Tom, Ryan, and Aaron "debrief" the discussion: do we desire covenant friendships in our lives, or how likely do they seem? What are the draws and challenges of covenant friendship, and should we as gay/SSA believers be concerned about the perception of such friendships?

The beginning of a new year often leads us to new physical fitness routines (including starting one). But so many of us have difficult relationships with working out: wounds from high school locker rooms, daunting equipment, comparing ourselves with the other men around us, and ultimately dissatisfaction with our own bodies. Are these hard things worth pushing through?

Pieter Valk joins us for a discussion on monastic or intentional community, with particular regard to his Nashville Family of Brothers. We talk about the logistics of living under one roof with fellow single celibate male believers, not just for a season or two, but for the long haul. Through every season.

We're back to answer some amazing YOBBERS questions from our "Side A" Friends podcast from a few episodes back. Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for another deep dive into the world of "Side A" friendships: that is, those friendships with fellow LGBT+ believers who hold an affirming view of same-sex sexual relationships. Some questions we tackle in this follow-up episode include: Would you go to a Side A friend's gay wedding? How would you pursue Side B friendship if you were the one who is Side A? And how do we apply Paul's words on sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 5 to the modern church?

Bill Henson of Lead Them Home, Posture Shift, and Guiding Families joins Tom, Ryan, and Dean for a special guest discussion on loving LGBT+ people – both inside and outside the Church. How do we better understand LGBT-identifying people or those who experience same-sex attraction, and how do we love them well?

"Side A" people follow Jesus with an affirming position on same-sex sexual relationships. As Jesus-followers from a "Side B" (traditional) position on marriage and sexuality, is it difficult or effortless to forge friendships with folks who are Side A? Join Tom, Dean, and Matt for a discussion on their experiences with Side A friendships: both with friends who started out Side A and also with friends who started out Side B – only for them to change to Side A. Can Side B-turned-A friendships survive? How do we build healthy Side A friendships?

Do we talk about pornography too much as the Church or not nearly enough? Do we "talk about talking about" pornography or do we actually talk about it? Pornography is more accessible than ever before and, increasingly, more aggressive. It's a struggle and an addiction that has reached and claimed all people: gay, straight, men, and women. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob as we take a deep dive into the science and story of pornography. It's one of our classic episodes that we're reopening in a new way.

It's an undoubtedly difficult season for many in our community, and we talk about singleness during the holidays: the disconnect, the loneliness, and the finding of hope and joy when hope and joy may feel so far away. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob share their stories of holidays past and present, answering some listener questions along the way, including the concept of spending the holidays with chosen family versus blood family, and whether we've ever been asked if we've found that "special lady" yet.

For better or worse, we all start with families of origin. But what of this concept of families of choice? A chosen family that goes beyond blood and DNA? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on chosen family: what it means for the LGBTQ+ community, what it means for believers, and what it means for this overlap of communities in YOB and beyond.

We're diving deeper into emotional attachment with special guest, Taylor Zimmerman! Taylor's blogged at Spiritual Friendship and spoken at Revoice. He's a University of Chicago student currently pursuing his third (3rd!) master's degree with interests in philosophy of religion, theology, and psychoanalysis — and how they all come together. Taylor talks to us about attachment theory and the four attachment styles: secure, ambivalent-preoccupied, dismissing-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. It's a fascinating psychological exploration into why we attach to other men the ways we do as gay/SSA (same-sex attracted) men.

We're back! After a brief summer hiatus, we return with our landmark fiftieth episode. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob sharing stories of emotional attachment: the good ways we attach to other men, and the not-so-good ways we attach. It's a callback to a previous episode on emotional dependency. We differentiate between "dependency" and "attachment" and share both our positive and negative experiences in relationship with other men.

Pull up a chair as Tom talks about the recent decision to remove our first 39 podcast episodes. Join Tom, Ryan, Jacob, and Dean for a vulnerable conversation on letting go. Letting go of people, letting go of the past, and letting go of the future. Because if we can't let go of old things, how can we ever let new things in? Before we dive into the nitty-gritty, we talk about Tom's Lenten "masturbation cleanse," his recent trip to a monastery, the "perfect friend date," and possibly rebranding our new hit intro segment, "The Brother Beat"?

What happens when intimacy with another fails to fulfill or runs out altogether? Can we ever ask for more intimacy? Can we trust again when intimacy is lost? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the second of our two-part discussion on intimacy. We share more of our most meaningful intimacy stories, including how one particular moment with Ryan and Jacob is one for Tom's intimacy "trophy case."

Intimacy is scary, and intimacy is vulnerable. Intimacy can be shared or rejected. Intimacy is special and sacred, and intimacy is everyday. Intimacy is sexual and emotional, physical and spiritual. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the first of a two-part deep dive into intimacy. The brothers define intimacy, likening it to a fire, discussing the differences and nuances between intimacy and vulnerability. They also talk about their first forays into intimacy many years ago and what the cornerstone of their most intimate relationships has been.