Resources
Diving deeper into faith, sexuality, and masculinity…
Our leadership, contributors, and greater community members may not collectively endorse every resource listed here, but some of us have found great value in them. We hope any of these blogs, podcasts, and other resources may bless you in your own faith journey.
For further discussions on some of these resources below, along with other favorites from our contributors and leadership, check out our two-part YOBcast on “Side B” resources: Part 1 | Part 2.
Books
Struggle Central: Quarter-Life Confessions of a Messed Up Christian
by Thomas Mark Zuniga
Struggle Central tells the quarter-life quest of an introverted Christian’s desperate cross-country search for purpose and belonging, both inside the Church and out. Brimming with tears of heartache and euphoria alike, Zuniga’s candid collection of “messy memoirs” follows life’s arduous journey through endless valleys and perilous climbs, reveling in the breathtaking peaks to be discovered along the way.
Tom is the director of Your Other Brothers and executive director of Your Other Family, and he also writes on his personal blog.
Single, Gay, Christian: A Personal Journey of Faith and Sexual Identity
by Gregory Coles
In an age where neither society nor the church knows what to do with gay Christians, Greg Coles tells his own story: I’ll tell you about a boy in love with Jesus who, at the fateful onset of puberty, realized his sexual attractions were persistently and exclusively for other guys. I’ll tell you how I lay on my bed in the middle of the night and whispered to myself the words I’ve whispered a thousand times since: “I’m gay.” I’ll show you the world through my eyes. I’ll tell you what it’s like to belong nowhere. But I promise my story won’t all be sadness and loneliness and struggle. I’ll tell you good things too, hopeful things, funny things. I’ll tell you that joy and sorrow are not opposites, that my life has never been more beautiful than when it was most brokenhearted.
Greg appears on our YOBcast 074: Belonging.
Washed and Waiting: Reflections on Christian Faithfulness & Homosexuality
by Wesley Hill
What does it mean for gay Christians to live faithful to God while struggling with the challenge of their homosexuality? What is God’s will for believers who experience same-sex desires? How can gay Christians experience God’s favor and blessing in the midst of a struggle that for many brings a crippling sense of shame and guilt? Weaving together reflections from his own life and the lives of other Christians, such as Henri Nouwen and Gerard Manley Hopkins, Hill offers a fresh perspective on these questions. He advocates neither unqualified “healing” for those who struggle, nor their accommodation to temptation, but rather faithfulness in the midst of brokenness.
Spiritual Friendship: Finding Love in the Church as a Celibate Gay Christian
by Wesley Hill
Writing with deep empathy and with fidelity to historic Christian teaching, Wesley Hill retrieves a rich understanding of friendship as a spiritual vocation and explains how the church can foster friendship as a basic component of Christian discipleship. He helps us reimagine friendship as a robust form of love that is worthy of honor and attention in communities of faith. This book sets forth a positive calling for celibate gay Christians and suggests practical ways for all Christians to cultivate stronger friendships.
Heavy Burdens: Seven Ways LGBTQ Christians Experience Harm in the Church
by Bridget Eileen Rivera
Religious faith reduces the risk of suicide for virtually every American demographic except one: LGBTQ people. Generations of LGBTQ people have been alienated or condemned by Christian communities. It’s past time that Christians confronted the ongoing and devastating effects of this legacy. Drawing on her sociological training and her leadership in the Side B/Revoice conversation, Bridget Eileen Rivera, who founded the popular website Meditations of a Traveling Nun, speaks to the pain of LGBTQ Christians and helps churches develop a better pastoral approach.
Bridget appears on our YOBcast 087: Heavy Burdens.
Born Again this Way
by Rachel Gilson
In this powerful and personal book, author Rachel Gilson describes her own unexpected journey of coming out and coming to faith … and what came next. As she does so, she addresses many of the questions that Christians living with same-sex attraction are wrestling with: Am I consigned to a life of loneliness? How do I navigate my friendships? Will my desires ever change? Is there some greater purpose to all this? Drawing on insights from the Bible and the experiences of others, Born Again This Way provides assurance and encouragement for Christians with same-sex attraction, and paints a compelling picture of discipleship for every believer.
Still Time to Care
by Greg Johnson
At the start of the gay rights movement in 1969, evangelicalism’s leading voices cast a vision for gay people who turn to Jesus. It was C.S. Lewis, Billy Graham, Francis Schaeffer, and John Stott who were among the most respected leaders within theologically orthodox Protestantism. We see with them a positive pastoral approach toward gay people, an approach that viewed homosexuality as a fallen condition experienced by some Christians who needed care more than cure. With the birth and rise of the ex-gay movement, the focus shifted from care to cure. For orthodox Christians, the way forward is to take a close look at our history. With warmth and humor, as well as original research, Still Time to Care provides guidance for the gay person who hears the gospel and finds themselves smitten by the life-giving call of Jesus, and guidance for the church to repent of its homophobia and instead offer gospel-motivated love and compassion.
People to Be Loved: Why Homosexuality is Not Just an Issue
by Preston Sprinkle
Christians who are confused by the homosexuality debate raging in the US are looking for resources that are based solidly on a deep study of what Scripture says about the issue. In People to Be Loved, Preston Sprinkle challenges those on all sides of the debate to consider what the Bible says and how we should approach the topic of homosexuality in light of it. In a manner that appeals to a scholarly and lay-audience alike, Preston takes on difficult questions such as how should the church treat people struggling with same-sex attraction? Is same-sex attraction a product of biological or societal factors or both? How should the church think about larger cultural issues, such as gay marriage and gay pride? Simply saying that the Bible condemns homosexuality is not accurate, nor is it enough to end the debate. Those holding a traditional view still struggle to reconcile the Bible’s prohibition of same-sex attraction with the message of radical, unconditional grace. This book meets that need.
Preston appears on our YOBcast 073: Gender Identity.
Gay and Catholic: Accepting My Sexuality, Finding Community, Living My Faith
by Eve Tushnet
Eve Tushnet was among the unlikeliest of converts. The only child of two atheist academics, Tushnet was a typical Yale undergraduate until the day she went out to poke fun at a gathering of philosophical debaters, who happened also to be Catholic. Instead of enjoying mocking what she termed the “zoo animals,” she found herself engaged in intellectual conversation with them and, in a move that surprised even her, she soon converted to Catholicism. Already self-identifying as a lesbian, Tushnet searched for a third way in the seeming two-option system available to gay Catholics: reject Church teaching on homosexuality or reject the truth of your sexuality. Gay and Catholic is the fruit of Tushnet’s searching: what she learned in studying Christian history and theology and her articulation of how gay Catholics can pour their love and need for connection into friendships, community, service, and artistic creation.
Bent on Men: A Memoir on Taboo Feelings, Fraternal Curiosity, and Faith
by Harrison Bly
As a boy, Harrison Bly craved male affection and camaraderie but never found his footing in the world of boys. Secretly gay in a conservative Christian world, Harrison compromised authenticity only to find shallow acceptance. On the crooked path to manhood, Harrison fumbled in the dark between ideologies on faith and homosexuality that failed to acknowledge his deepest wounds and longings. But through unplanned and unlikely relationships, Harrison discovered the transforming power of male love that reframed his obsessions, cravings, and curiosities, challenging everything he had come to accept about his masculinity and sexuality.
Harrison appears on several YOB ConvoCasts, including our YOB ConvoCast 085: Tom & Harrison Assess Male Friendship!
Guiding Families of LGBT+ Loved Ones
by Bill Henson
A biblically sound, relationally honoring care plan for parents and families of LGBT+ loved ones and pastors walking with them. The Fifth Edition features 227 pages of enhanced, reader-friendly design and new content built on two decades of experience.
Bill appears on our YOBcast 065: Loving LGBT+ People.
For an additional event resource, check out Posture Shift, a biblically sound, missiological approach to LGBT+ outreach and pastoral care. Posture Shift advisory council member and YOB contributor Aaron shares his Posture Shift experience on our YOB ConvoCast 076: Tom & Aaron Pitch Posture Shift.
Podcasts
Life on Side B
Josh Proctor and friends look at the lives of LGBT+ or same-sex attracted Christians who believe in the traditional sexual ethic of the Christian faith, and therefore live according to that view, whether through celibacy or a mixed-orientation marriage.
Hole In My Heart
Laurie Krieg is a teacher, author, and Hole in My Heart Podcast host whose mission is to equip Jesus-followers with a gospel-centered approach to sexuality. Laurie speaks and trains extensively about the gospel, sexuality, and marriage.
Husband Material
So you want to outgrow porn. But how? How do you change your brain, heal your heart, and save your relationship? Each episode will make it easier for you to achieve lasting freedom. Porn is a pacifier. This podcast will help you outgrow it and become a sexually mature man of God.
Other Resources
Revoice’s mission is “to support and encourage gay, lesbian, bisexual, and other same-sex attracted Christians – as well as those who love them – so that all in the Church might be empowered to live in gospel unity while observing the historic Christian doctrine of marriage and sexuality.”
Several of our YOB contributors have attended multiple Revoice conferences. Check out our blogs, YOBcasts, and ConvoCasts on those events.
Dr. Preston Sprinkle leads The Center for Faith, Sexuality & Gender with blogs, podcasts, videos, workshops, and other helpful resources, including posts from author Dr. Gregory Coles.
Enjoy The Center’s short film, Dear Church: I’m Gay.
Eden Invitation “creates space to receive the whole person, grow systems of mutual support, and empower for creative discipleship.” They are a Catholic community describing themselves as “disciples with LGBTQ+ experiences, building community with others who desire a way of life in congruence with Christ and His Church.”
Want to learn more?
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